It takes a little practice to become a connoisseur of men, so start off with the basics. The most obvious thing to ask yourself is, "What is he buying?" No matter how good he looks, how charming he is, or how much you want him, if all the man in front of you has on that conveyor belt is coffee and cigarettes, go to the next line. The coffee and cigarette man is a nervous wreck and will leave you a young widow.

Check his food. Is it all frozen or made to be thrown in the microwave? If so, chances are this man either cannot cook or simply doesn't care to cook. Life with this man will leave you doomed to slave over a hot stove or else suffer the life of a perpetual restaurant goer. Never will you be served a hot, home cooked meal at a well-set table unless it is by your mother who comes to visit and will undoubtedly complain about how you have no taste in men.

Your best bet is to find a man who buys "real" food; actual vegetables that grew out of the earth instead of in a vat somewhere in Chicago, meat that came off a four-legged animal as opposed to animal parts hastily stuck together with bits of soy product, pastas that are not shaped like letters of the alphabet. This is a man with some imagination. He is not intimidated by the kitchen. He is brave, adventurous and willing to take the time to create culinary masterpieces that can be savored.

Once you have weeded out all those men who cannot live up to your expectations in the kitchen, you have to do a personality assessment. What does he do when he has to wait in line at the check out counter? The most common thing for any person to do is to read the tabloids. Watch your potential mate's reactions when reading articles like "Bill Clinton Holds Secret Meetings with Perot and the Aliens!" Does he laugh? Or does he furrow his brow and lean closer to the newsstand? If he is one of the concerned, furrowed-brow men, throw away your checklist immediately. This guy can probably list from memory every conspiracy ever devised since Roman senators decided to kill Caesar. And if your man actually buys the tabloid you would be in for many decades of unwarranted paranoia ending in him turning on you after deciding you have been "in on it all along".

If the man of potential flirts endlessly with the cashier, this could be a good or bad sign. He may be a gregarious fellow, fun to take to parties, great to introduce to your friends. Or he could be an incurable playboy who can't be trusted to run to the store for a gallon of milk. Roll the dice and take your chances.

Does he impulse shop? If so, you better hope he has money. The impulse shopping male starts small, a pack of gum, a roll of Certs, a magazine. But impulse shopping is kind of like epilepsy. The seizures get bigger and bigger until you get medical attention. A pack of gum today will be a new car when he is 40 and has his mid-life crisis.

While in line does this man daydream? Does he get a romantic, starry-eyed look on his face? This man is an artist or a poet, if not in vocation, in his heart. He will bring you roses for no reason, he will write you love songs. He will wine and dine you by candlelight. Watch him as he daydreams, though. If the look of daydream fades into one of pure absence of thought and brain, nip him in the bud. He will be the one who falls asleep in front of the television at night or drifts off while you are telling him your deep, intimate feelings.

A man to be admired is the one who makes productive use of his time. A productive guy will do things like balance his checkbook while waiting in line or double check his grocery list or attempt to learn something new from one of the self-help magazines in the racks nearby. While the dreamer is nice, this fellow can be counted on to be sensible, reliable, logical in all things. He is what your mother means by "a dependable young man."

Check his attitude about being stuck in line. Does he try to sneak 14 items into the express line with a 12-item limit? The sneaker will sneak in all areas of his life. He will get away with all the little things he can and is not to be trusted. An honorable man shows courtesy to all those behind him by sticking to his 12-item limit.

Is he impatient in a subtle way? The subtly impatient man wants you to know he is impatient without seeming to be impatient. He will drum his fingers or tap his foot or sigh loudly. When the cashier apologizes he will insist there is no problem and he hardly noticed the wait. This man is not in touch with his honesty and guarantees communication problems for you as a potential life mate. He is the guy who pouts while insisting there is nothing wrong. You will never be able to win an argument with him.

Is he impatient in an obvious way? Does he make loud comments to the air like "Gee, I wonder if this is the cashier's first day?" The impatient guy will turn to the people in line with him and want to form a bond of impatience by asking you if you feel that waiting in line is the most ridiculous thing you have ever had to do in your life. Going out in public with this man will be an embarrassment for the rest of your life. He will make more waitresses and desk clerks cry than Humphrey Bogart in the last scene of Casablanca.

The best man to find is one who takes the Zen approach to waiting in line. The Zen shopper is one who knows there is a reason for waiting in line. All things come to those who wait. Go with the flow. To every thing turn, turn, turn. As a mate, this man will be patient, kind, considerate and slow to anger. He will be sensitive and caring.

It is impossible to take only one of these characteristics by which to judge your potential mate. It is the combination of them that must be weighed by the serious-minded huntress. To be a connoisseur of men it takes more time and patience than talent. All you need is a sharp eye and a basketful of groceries. And remember: practice makes perfect.